April 18, 2019

Dear Eva,

Hey sweet girl. You are amazing and I will love you forever. Thank You for coming through to Theresa last weekend. Mama needed that from you more than I realized. It felt like the weight of the world lifted right off my shoulders and I’m working hard at ditching the guilt and finding the joy. I want nothing more than to make you proud. I love you more than you know.

Grief Journal #3 – Things You Hated

Things you hated, seeing this prompt brought an instant smile to my face. You didn’t dislike many things but when you did it was fierce. You made the cutest faces and showed so much emotion that I can’t help but smile when I look back.

You hated Oysters. They are one of my favorite treats and you wanted so very bad to like them too. You gagged one down just because you knew mama loved them. It was the cutest thing ever.

You hated seeing Mama sad. You wouldn’t leave my side and you would always say “Mama why you cryin’?”. At such a young age you had such a deep understanding for other’s pain and you never let Mama stay sad for long. These days when I’m sad I try my best to remember that and to smile again. Anything to keep you happy.

You hated snuggling your dad. It’s true. You’d hug him and kiss him and then move along. The love was fierce all the same though. You were always happy to see him and his word was the gospel, but man oh man did you fight off the snuggles.

We love you baby girl. We miss you every single day. You are the moon and stars. Until I can kiss you again! For now I’ll kiss daddy extra!

Love and Kisses,

Your Mama.

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